Props to 'egatti' from Canucks.com for the awesome kesler bomb
As Jeff Goldblum would say "Life.....ah.......ah.......ah.......ah........ah..........will find a......ah......ah.......ah........way." Or in this case, Ryan Kesler will find a way, to get in another photo. Apparently Keslers photo bombing is all the talk in the dressing room.
(Read more at
Why do I talk about Kesler's photographic antics you ask? Why start off a gameday preview with Ryan Kesler's interview antics being the main focal point? What about the game, Wyatt, the game??
Because quite simply, there aren't many constants in the world, but one of those constants is the fact any Minnesota game will be 'shoot me in the head now, please, dear god, now' boring. Minnesota Wild games make you feel like changing the channel to Nascar. Never will the beauty and grace and understated brilliance of Nascar be as clear as when watching it right after a Minnesota Wild game.
There are a variety of ways this game could play out, but they will all end with the same thing.
Yep.
Uh huh.
You must be getting it by now...
Well that one confuses things a bit....
Assuming you followed that picture trail to its conclusion properly, you will notice that I think this game will end up with that beautiful gift of Jacques Lemaires that keeps on giving, THE TRAP.
Minnesota scores first? Get ready for neutral zone hockey at its finest. Nothing says hockey excitement like chipping the puck off the glass and lining up in the neutral zone to defend that lead.
Vancouver scores first? Get ready for neutral zone hockey at its finest. Nothing says hockey excitement like chipping the puck off the glass and lining up in the neutral zone to maybe get a lucky bounce to tie the game up.
Vancouver opens up a multi goal lead? Neutral zone hockey. Chip off the glass. repeat.
So yes, I am not expecting much in the way of an amaing game tonight. Add in the fact Vancouver just Blitzkrieged their roadtrip, reeling off 5 straight wins, add in Minnesota needing these points FAR more than we do, and add to the fact Vancouver is probably feeling pretty good about themselves, don't be too surprised if Minnesota kills us this game. And by kills us, I mean they generate 4 shots to our 1 shot in the first period in what will be described as "barely viewable even for someone in a coma".
With that said, let's try and generate some keys to the game.
Keys to the game...in this case HHH, who is known as the Game...get it? This works, right?
Key #1: Don't let Minnesota score. Now I know this is on par with John Madden telling us that getting touchdowns helps you win games, but this isn't so much a key to the game for Vancouver to win, so much as a key to the game for the fans not having to watch an even more torturous experience known as a Minnesota Wild game. The Wild trap enough as it is, but when they get the first goal? My god. It's like having a fat kid stuck in an elevator with you, with both of you not having eaten for 8 hours. You know if any food is found, the fat kid is going to fight you for it. But if that kid gets a whiff of a smartie before any food is found, well, that kid is going to ramp up his game ten fold. Don't let the Wild score first!
Key #2: Apparently play Aaron Rome more than Keith Ballard? I do not understand the man love AV has for Rome, but apparently putting Rome on the PP and playing far more minutes than Ballard seems to be a key to....something. A game I like to play when watching Aaron Rome play hockey is "When will dumbass get off the ice after staying out way too long." Seriously, Aaron Rome can average the same amount of shifts as Keith Ballard but still play 2-5 more minutes in a game because Aaron Rome has no idea how to get to his bench.
Key #3: Try not to fall asleep. As stated previously, the Caucks are coming off 5 straight wins from the road, but before that went .500 on their homestand. So they have a tendency to let their guard down at home as of late. Add in that all the teams they are facing are vying for a playoff spot (Except Edmonton. Sorry Edmonton. You got officially eliminated last night), it usually means the other team will be busting their ass, playing a tight road game, to try and beat you.
Key #4: Feed Danny the puck. Daniel needs his two trophies. The world will not be right until Daniel has an Art Ross and Hart trophy. Keep feeding Daniel!
That's about it. That's all the interest I can drum up for this game. Honestly, the only thing exciting for this game from a Canucks perspective is the fact this win would break the 100 point barrier, that it is another game in which Daniel can try and keep his lead on the Art Ross and Hart trophy chase, and it is another 2 points to try and put between them and Philly (Or Washington, who has won 8 in a row).
So how do you end a blog on the Wild and get people happy again? Why, with random quotes from the post game thread from the official Calgary Flames forums from last Saturdays game. Because if that doesn't put a smile on a Canucks fan face, I don't know what will. My comments in italics.
"Barring the clinching of a playoff spot, this season is a complete failure." - Reasonable enough
"I hate Kesler " - I feed off of the tears of your suffering.
"sigh* depressing loss...It sucks having to watch the Flames lose when you're sitting in a room full of Mexican exchange students who are all converted Canuck fans." - Viva la Mexico?
"MOD EDIT: Don't insult other posters." - This was repeated many times.
"Somehow I expected a wee bit more. It's like the hot girl that leads you on all night, and then doesn't want to do the dirty deed she's been teasing you with." - In Calgarys case, I am sure a burning sensation worthy of the Flames accompanies that 'dirty deed' most of the time
"You know how crappy of a poster you are when you are more annoying than a Canucks fan." - They are turning on each other. It won't be long now before they start eating their own young...
"one more post...im frikking sick of losing to the canucks....please STOP ... wow the flames really piss me the frick off. you know how many god-damn messages and calls i am getting because of these incompetent losers?? seriously this team can go to hell." If I knew any Flames fans I would text them as well.
"Not sure what game you watched tonight, if thats the Flames battling then god help us." - Winning. Duh.
"It's tough coming to the realization that the Canucks might get their first cup this year. If there is a God, that will not happen. Does anyone have a first born male they would be willing to sacrifice to the Gods to stop it? Even a calf, or some sort of sheep might due in a pinch." I hope we win just for the reactions in Calgary alone.
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