(Brett Favre in the untouched version of his SI cover shoot)
Minnesota Tribune, October 27th, 2010:
Brett Favre has been here before. Battered, bruised, and having to find the will to continue, to prove he can still go on. However this time he isn't lifting himself off anything that happened on a football field; This time he is lifting himself up off of a beating he took off of the field.
For those unaware, Brett Favre was recently caught up in a scandal off the field when it was reported that while being a member of the New York Jets, Brett had crossed the line with another Jets employee, one Jenn Sterger, who served as a sideline reporter for the Jets at the time.
The story being told is that Brett asked a person who worked in PR for the Jets to ask Ms. Sterger to give Brett a call, presumably under the premise for going out on a date. When Brett received no call from Ms. Sterger, he apparently left several voice messages inquiring into why she hadn't called him back. Along with the messages, however, were apparent racy photos Brett sent to Ms. Sterger as well; pictures of Brett's penis.
This is what we all know. But Brett recently opened up to give his side of the story.
"Look ya'll, I left those voicemail messages. I admit that. It was stupid. I don't know what I was thinking, I should have been more respectful to Ms. Sterger and to my wife and kids. But I still maintain I was not phoning her to ask her out on a date or to doing anything of a sexual nature. I was merely looking for friendship. Look, I'm a country boy. I'm not used to the big city, and what city is bigger than New York? I was lost, I was lonely, and I just needed some friendship, and Ms. Sterger, well, she seemed like she could use some comfort too. So I asked someone to give her a call on my behalf. And to be honest, I was hurt she didn't call me back. So I just wanted to wonder why she didn't call me back. Am I not good enough? Aren't I a fun guy? Why wouldn't that bitc-......ok, wait, see, you got ol' Brett going off again without thinking. I take that back. I wondered why she didn't want to hang out with me, that's all."
This all seems plausible. Brett could have indeed been merely looking for a friend. Afterall, we often hear of people with lots of money having trouble finding true friends, never knowing if people are associated with them merely for money. But that leaves us with the Penis Pictures. Why send pictures of your whang to a friend? Why show off the snake to someone you barely know? Why 'unravel the mysteries of life' on a cell phone picture?
"Well look, and here's the thing, the pictures of my boy parts, that's just crazy that people are up in arms over that. I always travel with the field general out in the open. I always make sure lil' Bret is marching towards the goal line in plain sight. It's a country thing. And that's what is so funny about this whole thing; I was trying to show off pictures of my new Crocs to Ms. Sterger, and then all of a sudden she flips out over my penis being in the picture? I didn't even realize my Green Bay Packer was out in the open, that's how used to it I am. I mean, imagine my suprise when I text "Look at my Croc's. They look hungry. Like a crocodolie. Get it? LOLLOLOL. Call me!" and she texts back at me talking about harrasment this, and sexual predator that. I was plain dumbfounded that she took it that way."
This seemed like a stretch that any normal person would believe this, but Brett persisted in following this train of logic.
"Looky here, looky here, ok? Right now? Penis. Out. Right there. (Editors note: It was). Doesn't mean a thing to me. Anybody who knows ol' Bret knows I always keep my "Hail Mary" cocked and loaded in case I need to get into the "End Zone" at a moments notice. In fact, if you look at the Sports Illustrated cover, they manipulated it so that I would appear fully clothed. There I was, so excited, excited beyond belief, like I mean, SO excited to be on the cover of SI, and I wanted to show my excitement over it. So what better way to do it than to line up the ol "Offensive Line" for the snap? But nope, they done went ahead and took it out of the picture, using that photo shop thingie they've got."
When asked if Brett had learned a lesson after all of this mess, Brett got reflective.
"Well sure, sure I have. I've learned that apparently people are shocked by my "4th and long" and that I have to take that into account when I send pictures out. In fact I went and made sure my Christmas cards are done up all PG like so no one can get mad at me. I hope people realize I don't mean to offend, I just find it natural to have my "End Zone" out in the open, so people know what they're dealing with, see what I mean? I have to realize that when making friends, not everyone is expecting you to "Go for it on the 4th down" every play, right? So I understand that now, and I think I have a good handle on things now. So I just wanted to again say I am sorry about this misunderstanding, and that it will never happen again. Merry Christmas ya'll"
Merry X-mas from Brett
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